I’ve never written about this…

I’ve never written about one of the most heartbreaking moments of my life and it has been weighing heavy on my heart lately. 

 

It was hard to calculate the twins odds of survival while I was on bed rest with them.

It was hard to see them for the first time b/c they were so tiny and fragile.

It was hard when I had to leave them in the NICU for the first time after I was discharged.

It was hard to leave Ellie at home for the first time to go visit Bennett alone.

It was hard to get that phone call from the doctor…the one telling us to please hurry, so we could say good-bye.

But, nothing was as hard as walking out of that hospital without my son forever. 

period.

I remember that day all the time.  I remember walking the path to the door as my two feet carried me, but I don’t remember feeling alive.

I remember the sliding door to the hospital door opening and feeling the heat on my face, but I don’t remember breathing in the air.

I remember looking at the valet attendant and shaking my head, but I don’t remember speaking any words.

Part of me went with Bennett that day.

 

My life doesn’t slow down often enough for me to grieve when I need to.  Today is one of those days that I am finding it hard to breath.

 

I love this picture…true love.

It’s TIME!!!

I’m late…

what’s new?!? 

I’m busy…

again, what’s new!!

It’s that time of year…

you know, the time that we BEG all of our friends (including those of you that read our blog that we may not know personally) and family members to please, please, please help us repay an organization that has done so much for our family.  It’s the one time of year that we talk most openly about our sweet hero, Bennett and remember how amazing his fight for life was. 

We are ready to form Team Chunky Monkey 2011 and we would be honored to have you be a part of this adventure!

I am working VERY hard to make this another VERY successful year and that isn’t possible without your fundraising and donations.  I am super excited that we are adding a fundraising event in March.  My parents have graciously offered to host this event and I think it is going to be a HUGE success!  More details on that later!!!  In addition, we have our annual crawfish boil in April!  We have such a fun group of friends and family that join us year after year and I plan on making up for missing last years celebration at this years party!!!

 

This year has been extra special for me when it comes to my relationship with the March of Dimes.  I was honored to be asked to be the spokesperson for the NICU family support program at The Women’s hospital of Texas.  I was a guest speaker at the Women’s hospital Labor of Love luncheon where I got to tell our amazing story.  It was an emotional day! 

Two weeks ago, our family of four headed up to a local TV station to join other MOD supporters in shooting this year’s kickoff video/public service announcement.  It was SO MUCH FUN!!! 

Last week, I was asked to speak at the Center.point annual March for Babies kickoff.  Again, I got to share my story.  I love that I am able to speak about our journey and be that real life connection between an organization and the difference it truly makes.  The MOD spends millions of dollars on cutting edge research to prevent prematurity every year.  Not to mention the money spent on research for pregnant mothers and babies born with birth defects.  It is an honor that I am able to use our story to convince others to help give back with us to this amazing organization. 

In the last three years our little family team has raised over $10,000.  That is FAR more than I ever thought we would raise.  We started our team as a family of three honoring a son & brother that we so desperately missed.  We have grown into a team with a consistently large group of supporters that walk with us and friends and family that donate to help us make a difference.  To be perfectly honest there is no better gift or honor than the support you all have shown our family during this journey. 

2008

2009

2010

The walk is May 1st. 

The first fundraiser is by invitation and will be held on March 26. (sign up to walk and you can count on an invite!!!)

The crawfish boil is April 9th. 

We are planning on having our very OWN team tent at the march this year ~ and we will be serving breakfast!!

 

Here is the scoop:
1. Donate to Team Chunky Monkey (TCM) and help us reach our team goal. Simply click on the sidebar to donate today or click THIS link. (click “join a team” and you will join Team Chunky Monkey)
2. Donate to Team Chunky Monkey and commit to walk with us on May 1st wearing your cool TCM shirt! Email your size to me at babyhopes1@hotmail.com.
3. Set an individual goal for yourself and have your friends and family sponsor you to walk with us on May 1st…still wearing the cool TCM shirt!

Whatever option you choose the money is donated to the March for Babies under Team Chunky Monkey and it all goes to the same wonderful cause.

How do I raise the money even if I don’t/can’t walk? Well my friends, that is simple. Last year, we had a teacher that made a deal with her principal to let teachers wear jeans for donating a given amount of money. Are you on a rodeo committee or in a family group at church? Will your boss allow you to leave a donation collection envelope in the break room or lunch room? We would love for you to share our story with all of those people and let them know exactly why we are so passionate about this cause. Encourage everyone you know to read our story at bennettandellie.blogspot.com and “get to know” us.

If each person that stalked stopped by our blog donated $1 we could raise a few hundred dollars! 

B and I are really trying to make the fundraising fun this year, so we are going to start off with this Challenge:

**For every person that leaves a comment on this post, we will donate $1 to TCM.  You don’t have to leave a long comment, a smile or “hi” will do just fine.  But, if you leave a comment we know you have read how important this March is to us and maybe you will go tell another friend or family member and they will donate…

WE are counting on YOU and the future of preemie babies are counting on US…let’s make a difference TOGETHER!  Let the fun begin!

Blessings,
Brandon, Angie, Ellie Grace, ~Bennett~ , and Cullen