My life in numbers...

My life in numbers:
25.3 - The number of weeks pregnant I am today!
26 - weeks pregnant when my water broke with the twins
28,6 - weeks pregnant when I delivered the twins
5 - weeks until my 1st goal of a 30 week delivery (not ideal, but it would mean survival)
10.4 - weeks until they will deliver our precious Cullen
1-3 - The number of contractions I usually have in an hour
5 - minutes between my contractions on Monday night
2 - hospital bags I have packed to rush to the hospital/doctor b/c of contractions
4.4 - length of my cervix as of yesterday (in CM)
9 - number of times I get stuck with a needle/week
2 - the number of pounds Cullen weighs at this point (at least)
1 1/2 - weeks until my shower...I am very excited about seeing friends!!
3 - number of hours I lay awake in bed in the middle of the night worrying about EVERYTHING!
0 - number of contractions I had on my strip yesterday
3 - number of contractions I had on my strip today...BOO!
10 million - things on my to do list!!!!!!!!!

The last few days have been just as up and down as the last few months have been. Monday was a good day and Monday night I was back at contracting 5 minutes apart. By Tuesday morning, they were 11 minutes apart and after my shower and call from the OB's office they were 7 minutes apart. So, we made our 2nd emergency trip in a matter of one week. Two hospital bags packed and two speedy trips to have tests and u/s done. After 5 hours of visits, doctors and tests we had good news from a bad/scary situation. My cervix measured 4.4 by transabdominal u/s with a VERY full bladder. That is the longest it has ever been...but, I watched them measure it a number of times. No funneling or change in dynamics. So, the verdict was that I am contracting very regularly, but they have not started to change my cervix at this time. Will they eventually? We don't know the answer to that. It is a "wait and see" game and it is NO FUN to be playing. I go back in on Monday morning for another Ffn and my glucose test and then next Thursday for my u/s. As long as the contractions aren't causing my cervix to change I am able to stay out of the hospital and as long as my body continues to respond to the terbutaline I am good. When the terb no longer can control the contractions I will be admitted for a mag wash and then hopefully I will be released again on the terb pump. We are PRAYING that the terb DOESN'T stop working and we can gradually increase my dose for the next few weeks if we absolutely need to just to get me through. I am currently on .09ML/5 minutes, .136ML/4 hours and .2ML demand dose as needed through my pump.

I am so sick and tired of hearing "well, you still have a long way to go" when I ask about a med increase or when I call in to the doctor. I ONLY have 10 weeks left people and let's face it...if I make it to 30 weeks we have accomplished huge goals. Every week beyond that is just another blessing. I am tired and scared. I feel guilty b/c I know it could be a lot worse than it is and if I "only" contract for the next 10 weeks than I consider that a huge blessing. The thing is I never know if the contractions are causing cervical change or not. To be perfectly honest, even if they aren't causing any cervical change knowing that you have 3 contractions/hour regularly is a lot for any mom to handle. I am trying to keep the stress level at a minimum, but some days it's just plain hard. I have found a new blog friend that is in a similar situation, although she seems to handle challenging news with much more grace than I do! Julie has a story that will break your heart. She is pregnant with her second little boy and just a few weeks behind me. Her story deserves just as many prayers as ours, so stop by if you get a chance.


On a brighter note, B did get Cullen's room all painted and the crib put together. It looks awesome! I will take pics just as soon as I get my new laptop back from the hospital! (another story for another day) I am borrowing my mom's Mac.Book in the meantime. Ellie's room has transitioned nicely into a "big girl" room and a room for guests to sleep! I can't wait to get the antique dresser painted and his changing table in (it's on backorder!). We have an exciting week next week with a doctor appointment Monday, painters and window installers on Monday, new carpet and another appointment on Thursday. Plus, my fun summer dresses should arrive from Old Navy and the last of Ellie's goodies from Pottery Barn for her room will be here! Yeah for getting some MAJOR tasks accomplished! B and I were laughing the other day b/c the last time I was on bed rest we had carpet removed and wood placed in our house! This time we are having all of the bedroom carpets replaced! There is something to be said for getting your house together when you are stuck inside of it for MONTHS at a time!

I want to thank all of MY blog friends and real life friends for your continued prayers. This is going to be a war...not just a battle and it will go on for some time. I can't say thank you enough. I am beyond grateful for those of you that add us to your church's prayer lists and send out emails to family and friends. We appreciate each and every prayer and kind word we receive.

Here I am on my second emergency trip! I look a lot better than the first time b/c I told them I was going to take a shower and paint my toes before I left! I couldn't imagine being admitted for good with out one last really hot, nice shower in my own bathroom and without painted toes!!! So, here I am in all my glory at 25 weeks 1 day!


For My thoughts are not your thoughts, and your ways are not My ways. For as Heaven is higher than earth, so My ways are higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.

Isaiah 55:8 - 9

Blessings,
Angie