A one way ticket…

back to reality!

 

I’ve struggled in the last year (if you asked B he would say even longer) with how to approach our treatments for our cystic fibrosis. 

It’s hard because having 3 people in one house that have CF is no picnic!  I’ve blogged before about the HOURS and HOURS worth of treatments every.single.day that I would be responsible for.  If you add in the sterilizing after each persons treatments combined with our normal day activities I would probably never even get out of the front door.

So, I’ve found myself approaching CF treatment from a more reactive point of view VS. proactive.  (which is so odd if you know me.  I am totally the type of person to be proactive first to prevent any possible derailments)

I am being totally honest when I say it’s solely because:

1)my kiddos and myself have had a really great past few months health-wise

2) the time involved with CF treatments for 3 is a total nightmare 

Do I kick myself in the butt when one of them gets sick…YES!  But I wanted to do some major butt kicking this past weekend and the only person to blame was ME!

I’ve been feeling very run down and generally, under the weather for over a week.  My body never declared itself one way or the other that it was sick, but I just knew something was brewing.  Still, I kept my busy schedule and even went out of town for a few days.  On my little get a way I really started feeling run down.  I returned home to more of the same.  On Sunday, it all came crashing down.  The cough, the exhaustion and then the blood in the sputum.  It scared the death out of me! 

I was furious with myself because it was a slap in the face that we have a serious disease that IS progressive and NEEDS treatment to be kept at bay.  I was scared because for the first time I thought maybe I would be sent to the hospital for treatment and who would be here to take care of my babies.  It was just a brutal reminder of what our reality is. 

B and I have been organizing things lately.  In our house and in life.  I feel like there is a reason for this.  We have to simplify a few things in life in order to  make room for the things that are truly needed.

This momma needs to get it together!!

Here are some (horrible quality) i-phone pics of my babies last week as we prepared for family pictures! 

And one of my little princess.  Funny story about this picture.  Ellie wanted Cullen to play dress up with her.  He wanted to play with his trains.  So he told her to “Leaf me alone” and she got her feelings hurt.  She looked at me and said, “Well, I guess the wedding is OVER!” 

HILARIOUS!